brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
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