I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
