I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
