i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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