i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
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