Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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