Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
The ass gains better be worth it
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