we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
