me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize