you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Randomize