She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
