Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Randomize
