I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
