do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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