but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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