porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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