My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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