Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
