Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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