do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
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