I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize