I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
