id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
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