I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
