I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
