all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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