ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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