Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
