I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
