is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
