whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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