he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
jump out the window naked night went bad
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
