who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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