I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
ttyl tear gas
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
the liver wants what the liver wants
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
