You work out of a Hotel?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
