I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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