whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
