cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
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