I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Of course I have a pirate flag
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
