Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
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