OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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