Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
