I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
im six kinds of drunk right now
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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