I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
