And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
