The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize