But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize
