You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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