I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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