I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
They are going to name an STD after you.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Randomize
